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“So I've started wearing sweatpants to bed because I really don't need Santa seeing me in my underwear.”
Rowley Jefferson: My mom said to just be myself, and everyone would like me.
Greg Heffley: That would be good advice if you were somebody else
Greg Heffley: Stop. You look like one of the seven dwarves. Always wear one strap. One strap is cool.
Rowley Jefferson: Then why do they put two straps instead of one?
Greg Heffley: [walking] Because the people who make backpacks aren't cool.
Greg Heffley: [stops walking] You know what has one strap? Machine guns. You know what else? Electric guitars.
Greg Heffley: [continues walking] You know what else?
Rowley Jefferson: Purses?
Greg Heffley: [looking at class favorites] The class favorites.
[opening the section]
Greg Heffley: They're the best in their class. These people aren't nobodies. They're famous. They don't have to worry about getting a seat in the cafeteria, either. Check this out. There's tons of things I qualify for: "Most Likely to Succeed", "Best Looking", "Class Clown". They should just give that to me right now.
Rowley Jefferson: Don't you have to be funny for that?
[spotting something in the section]
Rowley Jefferson: Hey! We can try for cutest friends!
When you're used to having electricity and all of a sudden it's taken away, you're basically no farther than one step away from being a wild animal.